Obviously love comes in many shapes, forms, styles etc. What I will attempt to discuss is romantic love.
The reason I am even bringing this topic up is because in conversations over the weekend, different scenarios were brought up. We discussed first, second and even third marriages, knowing that this is the ONE, and what makes it a good relationship for YOU. We are all very different to say the least.
So here is my list, and explanations, of the top three romantic relationship must haves:
- Friendship: I am not saying that you have to be friends before you start dating (although that helps)…BUT if you were not dating this person would you want to be their friend?? Because when the ooey gooey love/lust wears off, what you have left is a person you have to like, want to be around, and continue growing with. If this is questionable, my suggestion is…move on!
- Expectations: Your expectations have to be on the same page. Again, I am not saying to grill anyone to make sure you’re seeing eye to eye on the first date. However, as you have conversations, as you discuss goals and dreams…do they align? Heartbreak often happens when the expectations we set on someone else do not happen. But guess what, they have to set their own expectations. You set yours for yourself, and if YOUR expectations aren’t reaching their full potential or their expectations begin to go a different direction than your own, then…move on!
- Reality: Your romantic relationship cannot be based on a movie, a Disney story, or songs you hear on the radio. Of course we see the couples that seem to have everything: best dates, best proposals, sticky icky love etc. And that may or may not happen for you (if you want it). The key things to look for and have are: respect, honesty, and time. Whether someone is planning a huge surprise for you with gifts and balloons, and magicalness OR someone takes you on a hike with great conversation – both are utilizing the same principles, time. Point being, if you don’t have the story book events, but they give you time, respect and honesty, YOU are winning either way. And of course if you’re not getting any of those things…move on!
Of course there is much more to say, and much more to discuss, but I will leave you with those three thoughts. They are all my opinion and my mere suggestions. We all choose our own path. I myself have not had the easiest path to love, and I don’t have a sticky icky love oozing marriage. But we love each other, we respect each other, we give each other time, as well as, space, and are honest…always. I have had all kinds of romantic relationships in my past, but I find myself being the happiest knowing that no matter what, there is a person I count on to push me to success, to be there for me in his own special way lol!, and someone who will always be my best friend.
Happy love thoughts to you all 🙂